A House Is A Building...A Home Is A Feeling

Well, it’s happening...The utmost favorite house of my last 30 years is going into the hands of our realtor.  We asked her to walk through and let us know what we needed to do to sell it quickly. I can’t let this drag out, if I do I have a feeling I won’t do it. She walked through and and made some suggestions. It didn’t bother me that the carpets need to be replaced, the floors need to be pulled up, the fixtures need updating, scratches in the doors need to be stained, the basement needs painting, the window coverings need to be removed, or even that the swing set could stay or go...and I had to ask myself the question “Why am I ok?”  I thought that changing everything about my favorite house would tear me apart.  Here’s the thing, the reason that this all needs to be done is because we lived hard...with all our heart and soul in that house.  The day we moved in my kids were 1, 8, and 11. They are now 20, 28, and 30.  In the past 20 years we went from a family of 5 at our dinner table to a family of 9.

I am a little relieved that we need to make these changes to the house because maybe it won’t feel like mine anymore.  I won’t walk by every scratch, carpet stain, homemade shade, out of date curtain, gold faucet, array of floor coverings, and think that someone is going to erase all of those memories that we made.  I know how every scratch, stain, and tear was made  and why the floor was so worn out.  They happened from dogs and kids running, playing, spilling, throwing...living. The amount of memories that I see every time I turn a corner is insurmountable.  I look out my front door and I see my kids getting on the bus every morning as Cody sits on the front step, I look at the screen door and I see Gracie pushing it open with her nose, I look out my backyard and I see the kids swinging, Eric and Jake playing baseball, Dani and her friends hanging out around the firepit, and best of all I see a hockey rink full of skaters.  I look at the fireplace and I see many nights of Eric and I listening to music contemplating life's ups and downs.  

The bar in the basement...Completely unexpected feelings set in.  This was meticulously planned and built by Eric during a very rough time. The year following 9/11. I see 20 years full of ticket stubs, college visits, license plates, vacation memorabilia, Air Force remembrances, hats, flags, towels...every few years we would decide to start a different collection!  I am pretty sure that all 3 of my kids sat behind that bar, probably had their first or second drinks as well!  I know that a lot happened down there from Bar and Bat Mitzvah weekends, wedding weekends, birthday parties, parent hockey parties...and so many movie nights and sleepovers.  Each of us will have our own memories to take with us.  Some things will physically join us while many will emotionally be with us. Regardless, we will embrace this change together.  And together we will realize that "A House is a building and a home is a feeling"

 You can leave the house behind but bring your home to wherever you are.