I am challenged by my every word by my 22 year old. However now, 8 years after I wrote this 1st blog about her, it is about real life.
8 years, high school and college…all in the past. I watched this beautiful girl grow into this beautiful woman. She is strong, independent, still a little OCD, but the furthest thing from an introvert, which is how I described her 8 years ago. She eased into high school, with little struggles here and there, (but this is where she learned to react with positivity). This is when she learned she is not going to play the drama game, she is going to do what is good for her and no one else. She was the hockey captain, where again she did not play the games and get into the gossip and drama that most girls would. She was a leader and a confidant.
Fast forward to college…I worried beyond belief about this girl being on her own with us 1/2 across the country. This is when she started calling me every day, multiple times…to which she still does to this day. The one who for 18 years was so quiet and not much for long conversations. All of a sudden she’s calling every morning to say “Hi’. I thought that this would be a phase…4 years later I always know that my phone will ring and it will be this cute kid popping up on my phone. The conversations can be quick or we can literally be on speaker or FaceTime while we are both making dinner not saying much. I don’t care what it is , I’ll take it.
She has made lifelong friendships in her past 4 years, found someone who makes her truly happy, worked through school, played hard and worked hard…This kid lived the last 4 years to her fullest, even through Covid. This threw everyone for a loop, but she thrived through it, and we got to have her in Vegas a little more than I could have hoped.
Here we are 8 years after the blog that I wrote about my little OCD , introvert. She is graduating tomorrow from The University of St. Thomas with a degree in finance, taking a well deserved trip to Europe, moving into her apartment, and starting the rest of her life. She made it her goal to have a job before she graduated, and with more than 1 offer picked the company that best fit her. She’s got so much ahead of her and to say that I am beyond proud of her, especially after reading the blog I wrote 8 years ago, is a complete understatement. I know I am not the only one who has ever had a child graduate, (well, because she is our 3rd child to graduate college), but the deep feelings of time being a thief, and the deep feeling of pride, watching all of our kids grow and live their lives is somewhat surreal. We are all getting older, and as much as I miss my kids being little, watching them grow at this parcel of life, I didn’t expect to love so much. So with that, I leave you with the blog that I wrote 8 years ago for my Sadie.
Congratulations little girl…You did it and we are so proud. We love you 🥰
Why fit in when you were born to stand out.
I am challenged on my every word by my 14 year old...
"Mom, Why do you have to be so judgmental?"
"Im watching "The Voice" Sadie, its a judging show..."
Me, judgemental? I have an OCD, introvert teenage daughter who doesn't seem to care what anyone else thinks about her...(in a positively strong way) She is the last one to worry about what everyone else is thinking or doing. She claims she's not an introvert but as we go down the list of characteristics we both nod at each other and laugh at each one because it is so her! Sadie is her own person who doesn't always like to have a conversation or show affection with hugs and kisses, and I'm ok with this...really, I am!
So no, I am not judgemental of anyone else's parenting or child because who am I to judge when I have had to make excuses for Sadie for 14 years. My best excuse is that she's tired! Have you ever seen a child tired for 14 years!! Anyone who has known Sadie for the past 14 years has seen my tears and my joy. I have gotten so used hearing "Sadie is Sadie" and understanding that others see her as this amazing, strong little girl who will always do her own thing and be her own person...and so "Sadie is Sadie" has become such a positive statement in my life.
[thank you to those of you who have helped me to see that...you know who you are!]
Sadie is my friend, whether she likes to admit it or not. Some days she'll admit it and some days not. She spends more time with me than anyone else is right now and even though she is not always with me in mind and spirit, she is in body. She is another body eating, drinking, and breathing with me at the dinner table. Little does she know her mind and spirit will be right there with me someday and I'll be there waiting. But for now I will just look at her and watch her grow before my eyes.
Middle school will be coming to an end in 2 short weeks and on we go to high school. As I am watching some of my parents at work right now struggling with their babies going off to kindergarten, I am tearing up for them as well as myself knowing how fast this time will go. I think about all of the things that are ahead of my OCD introvert (ok, maybe not an introvert...) child and I can't help but think that she is going to get through the next 4 years beautifully...she is smart.independent.strong.amazing. I'm sure there will be plenty of tears, struggles, smiles and laughs, but what would life be if you didn't have these challenges before going off to college.
This child cleans her room nightly, keeps up her schedule weekly, changes her room decor quarterly, and can't stand things out of place! She googles anything about everything...sicknesses, traveling, decorating, history...she wants to know it all! I sometimes wonder...where did she come from and who
am I to judge... She thinks Eric and I are crazy and the fact that she has to leave us alone together to survive some day scares her...she has told us that!
All in all I don't know what I would do without my later in life baby! I love this kid for more reasons than I could even begin to explain. She has challenged me to no end and has made me a stronger mom that I thought I was or ever could be.
"Being A Mother Is Learning About Strengths You Didn't Know You Had And Dealing With Fears You Never Knew Existed"
While Every neurotic parent has their neurotic parenting moment, just remember there will be a day when we are missing the years we weren't sure we would get through. If we can say we did the best that we could, then that should be all that matters. Don't criticize, judge, worry, or second guess yourself...you did a great job... and your child was born to stand out...
I needed the right person to come into my life at the right time, and he did. He was, is, and always will be my "My Beshert"
Time went on...we grew up... together. We went from 18-22 years old at the U of M. We definitely had many ups and downs, but those 4 amazing years were lived with many adventures, laughs, surprises, and in the end, marriage and 3 kids. Our life together has been beyond beautiful. Our years living in the Air Force were sometimes a little rough, but once again, he got us through this part of life with laughs, smiles, and optimism. I wasn't always an optimist, but once I learned how much better life can be with a positive outlook, I realized why live any other way? We began to feed off of each other in the way we looked at things. We have gotten through 29 years of obstacles from religion, living half of our lives apart, job layoffs, as well as losing a parent and grandparents. This may be no more than many other couples, but we would get through things together...without fighting. We look to each other for strength and love, and it is always there. 
Life changes rapidly and it sometimes can be hard to realize that as our kids are aging so are we. We may look older and feel older, but "we" are not aging. He still makes me laugh myself to tears, He takes care of me as if we just started dating, he impresses me to no end. There is nothing he would not do for me, our kids, family, friends...anyone. He is the most giving, unselfish, person I've ever known. I feel so completely blessed to have found this man and sometimes so undeserving to be loved by him. He sacrifices his time and happiness to make sure everyone around him is happy. You do not find this in very many people. I have no words to express how excited I am to move into our next phase of life together. To see him be a Grandfather to our first granddaughter is going to be one of the most incredible experiences yet. Our life is a journey, and there is no one else I would rather be on this journey with. I wish for everyone to experience the kind of love we have found, if even for a short time...to feel as loved and to love someone with all your heart. Little did I know that when I walked past him in the dorm, when we were 18, that I had walked past "My Beshert" The one God chose for me. I love you Eric
